Let’s go on a journey with someone who experiences anxiety, depression and low self-esteem.

Imagine this.

You’re in your car on the way to something that’s quite important to you. It could be a party, or that special interview you’ve been waiting for, and when you get there, you know it’s going to be really, really good for you, and fun. Because, well, quite frankly, it’s been a while since you’ve had any fun whatsoever, hasn’t it?

The traffic is light and you’re enjoying the journey, when you hear some unexpected noises behind you. You turn your head around and see two kids in the backseat! On one side is Miss 5 (M5) and on the other side is Master 7 (M7) and you immediately think “Geez, where did you come from? Wasn’t this meant to be a solo trip?!”

Feeling kind of annoyed, you keep driving, because, if you turn back to drop these intruders back to where they belong, you’ll be late for this event. You have waited so long for this, and did I mention how much you are looking forward to it?

In a sullen voice, not too far down the road, you hear M5 shout out from her seat, “Why are you going there anyway?! You know you’re not worth it. You’re just going to make a fool of yourself anyways”. Like clockwork chimes in M7, “Look down and see what you are wearing. Why, on earth, did you wear ‘that’ and couldn’t you have done your hair differently?”

Without thinking, like an unconscious reaction, you take your eyes off the road and glance at your outfit and catch a quick look at your hair in the rear-view mirror, catching the eyes of those kids in the back seat. You’re pretty sure you saw them winking at each other too as you’re fixing your hair and yeah, now you are wondering, why DID I wear this outfit?

In that moment, about eight thoughts pop into your head automatically, but the main one is “WTF#@! Who ARE these kids anyway?”

One thing IS for certain, and it sure as heck doesn’t feel like it, but these kids love you beyond any love you’ve ever experienced before. In fact, these kids will do anything, and I mean ANYTHING to keep you protected. You don’t know it, but these kids have an agenda. That agenda is, that they want you to stop the car, no matter what, and not let you get to this destination.

You keep driving, because you don’t want to be late.

And so, a little way down the road, you hear some sniffing. You ignore it. Then, you can hear M5 blowing her nose into tissues. Lots of tissues. You look back around and her face is flushed and you just know what’s going to come next. Yep. The unleashing of those tears. At first, they take a while to surface, but oh my goodness, the sadness. You’re in a quandary now. “Should I pull over?” you think to yourself.

And right before you get to decide the answer to that question, M7 starts getting agitated on the other side of the backseat. You look back at him, and can see the heat swell in his body and face, sweat coming from his little palms, his eyes slightly glazed over, and all of a sudden, every ounce of colour is drained from his face, not to mention that this little dude is not breathing normally at all. He looks really scared. Actually, it’s more than that, there’s a sense of terror pulsating throughout his entire body and the look of helplessness and fear are just too much for him to cope.

There’s no way you can keep driving, so you pull over and comfort these two kids as best you can. It takes a while, but eventually, you feel that their bodies start to return to normal. But, now you’re really late, and irritated because you think you’re going to be wrongly judged when you get there. And no doubt, you probably will.

Little do you know now, but the kids have had a win. They got you to pull your car over. Miss Depression and Master Anxiety are, yet again, calling the shots. But their outbursts weren’t enough for you to turn back home. And, you’ve been dealing with these noisy intrusions for decades now, so you’re kind of used to pushing through these sort of moments.

Then, M7 knows he needs to up his game to stop you once and for all, getting you to this event. So, he yells out in his best attention seeking voice, “I need sugar! And you say “Yeah right, like I am going to stop my car and give you THAT!” But he screams, “I’m diabetic and I need sugar NOW or I’m going to pass out”. You quickly glance back, as the responsible adult that you are, and see that this kid is actually not kidding, and he is in fact starting to lose consciousness.

So, you do what you absolutely can, in that moment, and find a shop that sells juice- immediately.

As you are returning from buying the juice, the little boy smirks to himself and says to M5, “See, we just had to distract her.” You come back from buying the candy and rationalise that it would be an insult to those people you’ve probably really annoyed, so you decide to turn back home. You figure that no one really wanted to see you, anyway.

M5 jumps in the front seat, and warmly snuggles into you as best as she can, as you turn into the direction of home.

Why is my anxiety and depression, relentless?

In the story, the kids succeeded. It took a fair bit of effort, but they were relentless in getting you to turn back home. Back into your safe place, your comfort zone, the place of familiarity. In reality, those two kids, were not exactly in the backseat of her car. They were inside of her. Those relentless thoughts, doing what they do again, and again and again.

This kind of scenario is what is happening a lot of the time, to a lot of people. Maybe you could relate to some parts, yourself, even if that exact scenario has never happened to you? When the mental pain is too much, what does your brain do to distract you?  Your subconscious brain is designed to keep you safe, NO MATTER WHAT and will throw everything it’s got at you, for you to not take certain steps in life. Steps that might take you into growth, new experiences and dare I say it, even joy. It could look like relentless mind chatter. Things like, “I’m not good enough. What if I fail? What if I make a fool of myself? Who do I think I am, anyway?”.  Or, it could come over you in a more physical sensation such as sadness, depression, or even despair. If this alone doesn’t do the trick of stopping you, your brain will probably give you the most horrendous feelings of nervousness, fear, anxiety, panic attacks and possibly even flash backs. Anything to keep you from stepping out and heading into a new destination. And sneakily, if that doesn’t work, your brain will use plain old distraction techniques that conflict with your true identity, but you do it anyway. Common ones are, TV, shopping, Netflix, grog, social media sites, smoking, sex etc. anything that takes the pain away, even just for a few minutes.

Our brains are not very smart, but they are protective

The biggest and boldest fact from all my neurology training is this: The brain isn’t very smart, but my goodness, it is extremely protective. So, yes. Yes! Your anxiety and depression are absolutely keeping you safe!
But, knowledge is power and there is a much healthier and effective way of getting those parts of the brain to remain so darn protective. Perhaps you’ve had some trauma in your life? Perhaps your upbringing wasn’t the most ideal? There is a way out through the subconscious mind.

If you can relate to the story above and you’ve had enough of listening to, and letting those kids in the backseat win, email Rachael Doolan at Mind Body Resolutions info@mindbodyresolutions.com.au. Together, we can put a stop to it once and for all, utilising cutting edge technology targeting the subconscious mind, where M5 and M7 live. There IS a way to silence those little buggers without telling your story. TRTP isn’t talk therapy.

Rachael is a dedicated Neurolinguistic Programmer, Hypnotherapist and Trauma Specialist (TRTP) living in Thornlands, Brisbane. She has a passion for teaching her clients how to re-wire the synaptic pathways in the brain by encompassing the Mind & Body Connection and ridding debilitating conditions such as Anxiety, Depression, PTSD and C-PTSD once and for all with a delicate but incredibly successful & powerful 3-4 session process. Rachael is proficient in the language of the unconscious mind.
Rachael is also diligent in Soul Evolution and Self-Realisation, and is living her purpose of leading others to freedom from the constraints of their mind and past. This comes, first and foremost, from successfully transcending her own 3 decades of C-PTSD & traumas, as well as showing great determination to heal 17 years of chronic Lyme disease. Transformed people transform people.
www.mindbodyresolutions.com.au